Courageous Dialogue
On Friday, I was walking door to door in the heat of Missouri summer to invite business owners, community organizations, and church leaders to support my peace work.
At a life insurance company, two men expressed a lot of interest in North Korean people. They asked questions, and I shared stories from my travel and encounters with people in the DPRK.
“It sounds like we need to tear down the barriers,” Ryan reflected.
“We need to find ways to communicate love,” added Josh, “At the end of the day, it’s all about love.”
What most impressed me about my conversation with Ryan and Josh was their openness and interest in North Korean people. Both of them have heard a lot of negative rhetoric about North Korea in the media, but that has only fueled their curiosity to understand, rather than inflaming hatred or disdain for a nation and people far from home.
Their openness and curiosity reminded me of an encounter I had with two middle school students in Pyongyang in 2016. Let me paint the scene for you.
I was standing in the middle of Kim Il Sung Square. You’ve probably seen news clips of military parades rolling through that square, but it is more often a hang-out place for kids on roller blades. I’m a tall, white girl—quite conspicuous in the DPRK. Also, remember that people in the DPRK live in a state of war. The war we call the “Korean War” (they call it the “Fatherland Liberation War”) may have been relegated to history in most American minds, but it never actually ended. The horror and trauma of the war and ongoing fear of their “main enemy,” the USA, lives on in the collective conversation and imagination of North Korean people. Let’s return to that scene in Kim Il Sung Square.
Two boys approached me, and one greeted me in English. He asked where I came from. When I said I came from the USA, he responded, “You are from England?”
I repeated myself in Korean, “I am from the USA.”
When my words sank in, both boys took a step back in shock. The quiet boy turned and ran, but the brave one, who had initiated the conversation, paused. After a few thoughtful moments, he stepped forward and thrust his extended hand toward me in a handshake. We continued our conversation.
We all encounter circumstances, people, and conversations that scare us. It is natural for our defenses to automatically kick into gear, preparing us to fight or escape at any cost. This is why I am amazed whenever I meet people who instead manage to pause their defense reactions long enough to engage their curiosity and seek to better understand their partner in conflict. This kind of dialogue is truly courageous.
May we each have more courage to seek understanding and connection.
Reflection
Take a few minutes to reflect on Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:23-24.
Is there anyone who may be offended or hurt by you?
If so, have you done everything, as far as it depends on you, to repair your relationship with that person?
If you have, then take a few moments now to pray for that person. Bless them. Ask God for opportunities to show them love in ways they can understand.
If you have not, ask God for the courage to begin a conversation with that person. If you’re not sure where to start, ask God for ideas. When they start coming to mind – pay attention!
Originally posted at https://seedswillgrow.com/2023/07/04/courageous-dialogue/
Jennie Telfer is Peace Catalyst Program Director in South Korea. More about Jennie.
